Tuesday, December 25, 2012

Well, we are nearing the end of 2012 and I'm not sure what to make of the year. A little good, a little bad, a whole lot unexpected...

I'm working as a teacher's aide at our local elementary school and I love it. I'm heading back to college in about 3 weeks. I haven't taken a class in about 12 years, so it will be interesting trying to get into the groove of homework, etc again.

We are living in our 5th wheel still... no sign of a house in progress across the field, oh well, eventually we will get there. Right now our little home is leaking. Lots of rain and snow - I think we need a tarp or two to protect this place better. Today is the first day I've been able to have internet here. We picked up a little wifi device and are back in business. I do love technology.

My husband got me a Kindle for Christmas. I love it!  Sarah and I are busy with free books. Excellent. :)

Bay is supposed to be on her way here, but there might be a problem with the bus. I'm not sure exactly what's going on. They sold her a ticket online, but there's no way to pick it up?? Someday I will have things back in order with my family. It's my only regret about moving here - no easy access to family.

Well, it's time to get going on my Christmas dish. Happy Holidays to you!

Thursday, May 24, 2012

Moving, Working, and Other Stuff

My family is moving. We are going to be living in a 5th wheel while we are putting in a more permanent residence. I'm not sure how long we will be in that 5th wheel, but it's a nice one, with a decent kitchen, a regular shower, and a couple of recliners, so we should be comfortable. It's an adventure, is what I'm telling myself.

We spent a few evenings getting our area clear of rocks and weeds - it's next to the spot where John puts in his vegetable/melon garden each year. He pulled out a part of the fence (this area was formerly known as The Arena on the ranch), which involved hooking a chain to a couple of powerpoles (used as fence posts) and yanking them out with his pickup. He loved that.

I'm going to do what I did with the apartment and make my front area as pretty as possible. I need to get down to Chico to pick up Max's tree. I look forward to planting it after all these years.  It started in a petunia pot Max's very first Spring/Summer. I kept it right outside the window from his spot in the house (a big, comfy pillow bed which really helped with his Scoliosis).  I really miss that kid. I think about him every day and sometimes out of nowhere I start crying. Grief is an odd thing, stronger than just about any emotion I've ever felt and it can literally steal my words and make me feel powerless.

I've been doing a lot of landscaping sort of work lately. I left the grocery store back in April and I spend most of my time working on a berm-type island on a ranch (never-ending weeds). I've also subbed a bit at the elementary school. I've been an aide, the school librarian, the school secretary, and my most recent job there was cafeteria cook. I've enjoyed all the jobs and I hope that someday they have a permanent place for me.  In the meantime I keep looking, trying new things out. I spent 20 years doing the same thing - it's taking some time to figure out how I want to spend the next 20 years.

Also, I put a few prints up at Fine Art America. You can see my profile here.

Happy Thursday to you!

Saturday, January 21, 2012

January, Not What I Had Hoped For

I made a decision to start writing again. I told my writing friend, Cherie, that on Friday I would purchase a notebook and a pen. No more I-can't-get-to-the-computer excuses. Well, I didn't get the notebook - I did get the pen. I sat down and the only things I could think to write about were the death of my son and a horrible fight I had with my husband. Neither are subjects I think anyone wants to read about, but that's all I had. So, I wrote it out, then crumpled the paper and threw it in the woodstove. Does that count, does it count as a fulfilling my promise to myself when no one else ever sees the words? 

I'm not sure I've got any story ideas left in my head. I worry that the space I previously used for a creative side is now filled with endless money-making schemes. In my quest to get my head above water again (water=debt these days) I have fully squelched any creative urge I used to possess.

Oh poor me. Boo-hoo. What a baby.

My husband is home. I just I'm done for now. Not sure this counts either.